Strangers have the best candy.
You’re supposed to be doing something else right now, aren‘t you?
Yeah, me too.
It has been scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer.
How’s being an adult going, you ask?
Well, I turned on the wrong burner and have been cooking nothing for 20 minutes.
Fun with InterWeb translators.
Enter a sentence in English.
“Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.”
Translate it to French.
“Équipez la langue inventée pour satisfaire à son besoin profond de se plaindre.”
Then translate that to German.
“Statten Sie die erfundene Sprache aus, um ihrer tiefen Notwendigkeit zu genügen, sich zu beklagen.”
Then translate it back to English.
“They equip the invented language in order to meet their deep necessity to deplore themselves.”
I got laser eye surgery a month ago, but I still can’t shoot lasers out of my eyes.
Am I doing it wrong? Or should I demand a refund?
I don’t want to get too technical here, but according to prominent chemists, alcohol is a solution.